working monday

i am back working at my previous company. well i am quit surprised actually, it has been a 11 months since i have left there. i stoped going to work from 15th july. it was because i was turned off by my manager there. she was one nasty lady. if you ask me, there where two reasons for her to becom the manager. reason 1 being that she had been working with the owner of the company for 20 years or so and the second was that she was also his lay. she had this hell of ego. she was one reason i quit and so did this other fellow, soon after i did. this other fello Mr. KV was also some guy.man he had some crude understanding. i think southindians are born with ego. i have never seen a man stuck to a cell as Mr. KV did. he was a good buddy though. but dont know why, but he was kind of scared or something of the owner of the company. the owner of the company was Mr.P. he was a very lucky man. lucky, hardworking and certainly a business man. he knew how to do business. he could throw his money around. he knew how and he had enoughmoney to throw around. he was the one who interviewed me. he was the only one who could. he promised me a lot of things. he gave me authority in his company. there were many things to be learned from him. but he never much used to visit the factory. he just used to be at his office in town. befor i joined in , he used to come thrice a week to the factory, cause there was no one to handle the work as he did. then i came in and as soon as i was able to manage work on my own, his visit to the factory started reducing. now he would be there twice a month. he used to say to me 'son you work like you are me'. yeah i did feel better working like him and much better better if he did pay me as good. but he prefered to give me his word rather than his money. well i didnt want all his money. just the fair deal , for which i worked. all i was getting was words which kind of turned me off. its not even that i minded working at that pay, the position i had there was good. but the manager, we used to call her ma'am- Mrs SN. now she was the manager for only two reasons i have mentioned earlier. i dont know if she understands 'P' of production. she was (is) one stubburn lady. i didnt like her much more nor did she liked me much. she didnt like me because o used to override her command in the factory. when it came to work, i have a very simple policy, either u you show me the way you want me to work or you let me know what work you want me to do and let me do it my way. Mr.P had given me freedom of doing the work in my way and get it done. so she didnt me at all. but she couldnt do any thing about it. there where times when Mr.P used to flank her for interfearing with my work. but she had ego problem. she was a southindian too and she didnt like me for cutting into her power. we used to have our tussel every now and then. the frequency of our tussel was inversly proportional to the frequency of Mr.P's visit to the factory. so it had to be. i used to ignore her till she just kept insulting me and kept saying sorry. that was kind of a routine. but then she added insult to injury, that really really turned me off, so i went off on my own.

its monday morning and what the hell am i doing here ? i have quit this place 11 months ago, i have to be at GeP. I am having some trouble at GeP but i havnt quit there yet and so i shouldnt be here.it kind of made me scared i was shaken and i woke up. the clock showed 10:15 am, i was still home, my shift starts at 1:30 pm at GeP. so i need not worry. i can still make it to work. it is kind of killing me to start working on monday after i had such a weekend. what happned on weekend was another story , now i have to go and get ready. bye for now

the cell beeped , it was her message-
"you please stop calling me, i dont want to be in touch wit you. your presence is troublin me n when i'l b disturbed, you'l b disturbed, so please avoid."
i replied -
"Dats fair enf :-)
i dont want u to be upset
no trouble from me to you
from now on"

i made it as short and simple as possible. i dont know what was going in my mind. definately i was feeling a bit uneasy at that time.
i sat down with my pen and my dairy kept penning, what ever came to my mind. when she asked me 'you stopped writing your blog ?' I realised i had written some thing that day but never posted it so here it is as i had written it on that day 21 days earlier.
The heart has no mind, so it doesnt think. it only feels.
shakespeare says whats in the name. I would say trouble. that is what comes to mind when my name comes up. i have caused trouble for many people. if i start saying sorry to each one of them, it would eat up a major chunk of my life. but come to think of it , i must hae really caused trouble for my mother for she loved and hated me all the same. with me trouble started with birth. it wasnt the docter who misappropriated the time of my birth, but it was just me who was eager to stay where i was. not willing to be born. so they declared an emergency and cut me out. my mother used to say when they brought me out i was not breathing, the body had turned blue. the docter kept slaping me to make me cry. then it was to the incubator for me- its the same thing where eggs are kept to make chickens hatch out of them, & for the wise ones its a machine, so dont think i was put in a grass basket with a hen over me.
the next occurance of trouble as i was told happned when the nurse under whos care i was got arrested for the crime of child snatching. now, could it be ? she might have swapped me or something. i could never associate myself with both my parents.
anyways its all a part of history, 26 years have gone by and i am living the life i have received.
i prefer a defeat then surrender. she was giving me signs of trouble in the last couple of days. but i wouldnt ask her. i just kept pushing the envelop till finally she asked me to stop. my love story hasn't yet started and its already coming to an end. now it should have mattred to me , hurt me , but i do believe every begining starts with an end.
she said every time she met me there was trouble for her. i would like to tell her every time lovers meet sparks fly.no love story is complete without and finally it i am the one who is getting her in trouble than i will be the one getting her out. may be my timing wasnt right, but the feeling i expressed were true. next time you find trouble coming at you, let me deal with it. i am here to take all your troubles away, not cause them.
i hold nothing against you neither i expect you to have the same feelings as i do. the truth is love cannot be forced, another one is i cannot stop loving you.